fuel pump runnig, pressure at fuel rail and dead to the world. wont even try to fire.
might be time to shoot it in the head.

 

car sat for the whole night. started up like brand new. have no friggin idea what to do.

 

I'm not much good on finding electrical gremlins, so I can feel your pain. After reading all of the posts and suggestions, the only thing I can think of is the ECM (engine control module- computer). I've got an 08 2.4 and the ECM is on the drivers side near the front. Since the "bag of ice" thing gets it started again, some damn something is getting too hot and developing a fault. BTW if you really want to screw up the works put a 160 thermostat in it. If it stays cold too long it goes to reduced power.( been there done that,). Before I spent more money, check the coolant level and the fans to insure they run. If you had a way to get an exact coolant temp reading when it goes tits up that might be of help. Also, ask around about a decent independent garage. They will take more interest than the dealership when it comes to pinpointing a problem.Again I feel your pain. Good luck!

 

Did you ever try the can of compressed air turned upside down to spray the cold propellant (icy cold liquid that can frostbite your fingers) on the contacts near the ECM? It really does work well to isolate heat related problems.