Think I lost a friend, last Sunday
Senior Member
Joined: 03-12-2006
Posts: 258
From: Pittsburgh,Pa
You did the right thing absolutely.It was that person's fault for over extending themselves. My advice for you would be to forget about this person and move on. He was attempting to get you involved with criminal activity; some friend. You always have friends here so don't worry about one "friend" if you even want to call him that.
My ethics professor in college would have a field day with this guy. I refer you to Nicomachaen Ethics. This was authored by Aristotle and one of the chapters we had to read dealt solely on friendship. It is really boring but the lessons Aristotle teaches can still be used in life today.
My ethics professor in college would have a field day with this guy. I refer you to Nicomachaen Ethics. This was authored by Aristotle and one of the chapters we had to read dealt solely on friendship. It is really boring but the lessons Aristotle teaches can still be used in life today.
Senior Member
Joined: 11-14-2007
Posts: 1,240
From: Planet Earth
A true friend doesn't ask you to do something that could get YOU in trouble.
A true friend doesn't put you on the spot.
A true friend doesn't ask you to hide his things to protect assets from the Bankruptcy Court.
A true friend RESPECTS YOUR integrity and would never ask you to compromise it.
Did you do the right thing?????
Is the Pope Catholic?
Is a crab's ass water tight?
Do dogs sniff each other's butts?
Of course you did the right thing!
And frankly, that "friend" is not a true friend. More like...
A true friend doesn't put you on the spot.
A true friend doesn't ask you to hide his things to protect assets from the Bankruptcy Court.
A true friend RESPECTS YOUR integrity and would never ask you to compromise it.
Did you do the right thing?????
Is the Pope Catholic?
Is a crab's ass water tight?
Do dogs sniff each other's butts?
Of course you did the right thing!
And frankly, that "friend" is not a true friend. More like...
Senior Member
Joined: 03-02-2007
Posts: 1,197
From: Joplin,Mo
I also feel that you did the right thing. I think today many young people see what their parents and their parents friends have, and they some how block out that it has taken us all many years to have what we have. And they want it all "NOW" That may also be he reason for allot of financial problems.
I would probably write my friend a letter ( as well as keeping a copy for myself) and state how you feel, and why you refused to do what you did. And tell if what his friendship means to you. Then the ball is in his court as to whether he wants to remain you friend. Just my
I would probably write my friend a letter ( as well as keeping a copy for myself) and state how you feel, and why you refused to do what you did. And tell if what his friendship means to you. Then the ball is in his court as to whether he wants to remain you friend. Just my
Senior Member
Joined: 11-27-2007
Posts: 1,115
From: Austin, Texas
I also feel that you did the right thing. I think today many young people see what their parents and their parents friends have, and they some how block out that it has taken us all many years to have what we have. And they want it all "NOW" That may also be he reason for allot of financial problems.
I would probably write my friend a letter ( as well as keeping a copy for myself) and state how you feel, and why you refused to do what you did. And tell if what his friendship means to you. Then the ball is in his court as to whether he wants to remain you friend. Just my
I would probably write my friend a letter ( as well as keeping a copy for myself) and state how you feel, and why you refused to do what you did. And tell if what his friendship means to you. Then the ball is in his court as to whether he wants to remain you friend. Just my
And yes, to repeat YOU DID THE RIGHT THING!
Thread Starter
Platinum Member
Joined: 05-09-2006
Posts: 6,805
From: "Upland" Mesa, Arizona
I just thought I would post an update....
My wife (who is very diplomatic) is good friends with this friend's wife.....so, they had a little discussion and my wife explained that I was a little "hurt" by the attempt to implicate me in a fraud. I guess the 2 wives worked it out and the friend came to see me late yesterday afternoon.
He apologized for his attitude and for placing me in a precarious position, explaining he was "at wits end" trying to help his son and DIL. He further commented that he understood my concern and that, after further thought, he probably would not want to relinquish his garage space (man cave) either.
So it appears, all is well. We became BOTL and had a drink.
Thanks AGAIN, for everybodys input.
My wife (who is very diplomatic) is good friends with this friend's wife.....so, they had a little discussion and my wife explained that I was a little "hurt" by the attempt to implicate me in a fraud. I guess the 2 wives worked it out and the friend came to see me late yesterday afternoon.
He apologized for his attitude and for placing me in a precarious position, explaining he was "at wits end" trying to help his son and DIL. He further commented that he understood my concern and that, after further thought, he probably would not want to relinquish his garage space (man cave) either.
So it appears, all is well. We became BOTL and had a drink.
Thanks AGAIN, for everybodys input.
Senior Member
Joined: 11-28-2007
Posts: 145
From: Champaign, Illinois
So this friend (who's a retired LEO) visits with his son. They knew, previously, that I have 2 garages....one attached to the house and a "stand alone" that is my shop and repair area. He requested permission to store his son's 2 ATV's, trailer, boat and trailer and camping trailer in the stand alone for about 3-6 months. It appears the son, who is mid thirty's in age, married and NOT WORKING, is a fatality of our nations financial turmoil. He was laid off from his construction job and the wife is about to be laid off from her secretarial job. In order to conceal true ownership of their toys, they moved "legal" position to relatives but wish to retain them for their own personal amusement. Thus they wished to store them in my garage. They are in the process of filing for bancruptcy (and obviously hiding assets).
I declined indicating not wishing to be involved in a fraud regarding a legal proceding and besides I don't have room for storing those items because of some of my recent acqisitions (which was shown). My friend tried to convince me to store SOME of the items and I still declined. When they left, I could see he was mad and mumbled something about "being a great friend".
Thinking about how the majority of members have responded to discussions regarding our countrys problems, I believe I did the correct thing.....especially legally. So what is your opinion.....would you have accepted some risk. I do admit, having some apprehension that I did not help. But I do wonder about my friends ethics....remember he's a retired LEO.
EXTRA INFO.......the son and wife are living on the edge of life. Probably over extended based on previous discussion with my friend. They saved nothing, have no kids, and bought a lot of toys and extravagance items. The couple had a gross income of about $80,000-$90,000....bought a large number of items on credit and purchased a home in the neighborhood of $500,000 (after rereading my words here, I can understand HOW they ARE in trouble). The loss of employment by one of the couple would surely provide problems in meeting the life style.
Much more than this transpired (no harse words...other than what has been expressed about) but I think I limited my post to the facts.
So what would you have done?? I do not wish to lose my friend but I don't want to be an accessory to this fraud OR provide a hardship to myself regarding limiting the space in the garage.
Thanks....
I declined indicating not wishing to be involved in a fraud regarding a legal proceding and besides I don't have room for storing those items because of some of my recent acqisitions (which was shown). My friend tried to convince me to store SOME of the items and I still declined. When they left, I could see he was mad and mumbled something about "being a great friend".
Thinking about how the majority of members have responded to discussions regarding our countrys problems, I believe I did the correct thing.....especially legally. So what is your opinion.....would you have accepted some risk. I do admit, having some apprehension that I did not help. But I do wonder about my friends ethics....remember he's a retired LEO.
EXTRA INFO.......the son and wife are living on the edge of life. Probably over extended based on previous discussion with my friend. They saved nothing, have no kids, and bought a lot of toys and extravagance items. The couple had a gross income of about $80,000-$90,000....bought a large number of items on credit and purchased a home in the neighborhood of $500,000 (after rereading my words here, I can understand HOW they ARE in trouble). The loss of employment by one of the couple would surely provide problems in meeting the life style.
Much more than this transpired (no harse words...other than what has been expressed about) but I think I limited my post to the facts.
So what would you have done?? I do not wish to lose my friend but I don't want to be an accessory to this fraud OR provide a hardship to myself regarding limiting the space in the garage.
Thanks....
I agree with the majority here. Is it really your fault that they didn't when to say when....
Member
Joined: 01-29-2008
Posts: 54
From: Pittsburg, CA
It appears based on what you posted that your friends made the same mistake millions of others did which put this country in the mess it's currently in. May I suggest that having a friend stay with you while they find another place to live is one thing, secretly concealing the location of assets that never should have been purchased, that the bank may be trying to seize is quite another, especially on your property. You being brought down with your friend doesn't help either of you. I would say that you did the right thing. Give it time, maybe it's not as bad as it seems. Or on the other hand, maybe you did lose this friend but you still have your financial home in order. Maybe one day your friends and others like them will realize that it's time to grow up and take responsibilities.
Good luck.
Good luck.
Senior Member
Joined: 08-19-2007
Posts: 778
From: St. Louis
I'm just wondering if this was a storage issue or hiding issue. If title had been legally transferred from the couple in trouble to relatives, where is the fraud? Lot's of families caught up in the "he who has the most toys, wins" mentality have had to give up some of their toys. If they were sold to family members, lien or not, they are no longer liable. No fraud.