Why the put downs ????
#11
I hope this doesent go too far off what your asking about B/B
We all react differently to stuff. I think it's where you are at 'emotionally' on how we react or respond.
I don't need my peers or any one's approval or disapproval. If I ask one's opinion, then I want just that, and am prepared to hear the positive and negative, after all I did ask for it.
However, there are posts that folks put of things they have done. I like to see that stuff as it helps me to get ideas of what something looks like on this car.
My fender skirts are a perfect example in my case. I bought them, had them installed and posted images. Some liked them, some did not. I really didn't care. I posted pic's so others could decide for them selves if it's something they liked for THEM. I personally, after the install, didn't like the way they looked or their fitment as they were proto-types that didn't work out for me.
However, again, someone else did like them and worked out a deal with me on them. Not all is lost.
It was a learning experience not just for me but to our members and visitors too.
You can put my stuff down all day long, I don't' give a care. It looks good in my eyes.
We all react differently to stuff. I think it's where you are at 'emotionally' on how we react or respond.
I don't need my peers or any one's approval or disapproval. If I ask one's opinion, then I want just that, and am prepared to hear the positive and negative, after all I did ask for it.
However, there are posts that folks put of things they have done. I like to see that stuff as it helps me to get ideas of what something looks like on this car.
My fender skirts are a perfect example in my case. I bought them, had them installed and posted images. Some liked them, some did not. I really didn't care. I posted pic's so others could decide for them selves if it's something they liked for THEM. I personally, after the install, didn't like the way they looked or their fitment as they were proto-types that didn't work out for me.
However, again, someone else did like them and worked out a deal with me on them. Not all is lost.
It was a learning experience not just for me but to our members and visitors too.
You can put my stuff down all day long, I don't' give a care. It looks good in my eyes.
#12
Great attitude Sindy!! When I first joined here, I was kind of put off by some of the negativity; however, I grew some thicker skin and came back after a few months away, to enjoy the forum no matter what. You are right - we are all entitled to our own opinions, but we REPRESENT when we put it out there, and there will be people who enjoy, approve, learn from, etc. just like there will be those who gag at our cars. I've learned to read and dismiss - who cares, and you really don't want to waste your energy - it's the internet, for heaven's sake - people are WEIRD here!!!
I recently joined the forum hooked to my underbody lighting kit and WOW, lots of people there who tried to beat my car to a pulp. Now, I just laugh and love it anyway. I'm very familiar with the "my car is the only good car, except for my Dad's car" mentality - I raised 2 teenagers!! When you're insecure, you attack. You just gotta accept people wherever they are along the continuum... there's plenty of room.
I recently joined the forum hooked to my underbody lighting kit and WOW, lots of people there who tried to beat my car to a pulp. Now, I just laugh and love it anyway. I'm very familiar with the "my car is the only good car, except for my Dad's car" mentality - I raised 2 teenagers!! When you're insecure, you attack. You just gotta accept people wherever they are along the continuum... there's plenty of room.
#13
The issue
The issue in my mind is HOW some people say what they say. Not everyone will like everthing that others choose to do to their cars. If you ask for opinions or what people think, you need to be prepared for negative remarks, but you should not get offended, be offended or bashed. Negative remarks can and should be made positively and that is the responsibility of the person responding. There really is no need to respond both negatively and in an negative manner. That is just offensive and has, over the year I have been here, put MANY people off and drove them away.
Contra-minded thoughts on a mod can be useful if expressed properly and can give the person asking the motivation for "sober second thought". But at the end of the day what we do to our cars must make the individual owner happy, not every other owner on the planet. What a boring world it would be if we all always agreed. But disagree respectfully.
Contra-minded thoughts on a mod can be useful if expressed properly and can give the person asking the motivation for "sober second thought". But at the end of the day what we do to our cars must make the individual owner happy, not every other owner on the planet. What a boring world it would be if we all always agreed. But disagree respectfully.
#15
I hope this doesent go too far off what your asking about B/B
We all react differently to stuff. I think it's where you are at 'emotionally' on how we react or respond.
I don't need my peers or any one's approval or disapproval. If I ask one's opinion, then I want just that, and am prepared to hear the positive and negative, after all I did ask for it.
However, there are posts that folks put of things they have done. I like to see that stuff as it helps me to get ideas of what something looks like on this car.
My fender skirts are a perfect example in my case. I bought them, had them installed and posted images. Some liked them, some did not. I really didn't care. I posted pic's so others could decide for them selves if it's something they liked for THEM. I personally, after the install, didn't like the way they looked or their fitment as they were proto-types that didn't work out for me.
However, again, someone else did like them and worked out a deal with me on them. Not all is lost.
It was a learning experience not just for me but to our members and visitors too.
You can put my stuff down all day long, I don't' give a care. It looks good in my eyes.
We all react differently to stuff. I think it's where you are at 'emotionally' on how we react or respond.
I don't need my peers or any one's approval or disapproval. If I ask one's opinion, then I want just that, and am prepared to hear the positive and negative, after all I did ask for it.
However, there are posts that folks put of things they have done. I like to see that stuff as it helps me to get ideas of what something looks like on this car.
My fender skirts are a perfect example in my case. I bought them, had them installed and posted images. Some liked them, some did not. I really didn't care. I posted pic's so others could decide for them selves if it's something they liked for THEM. I personally, after the install, didn't like the way they looked or their fitment as they were proto-types that didn't work out for me.
However, again, someone else did like them and worked out a deal with me on them. Not all is lost.
It was a learning experience not just for me but to our members and visitors too.
You can put my stuff down all day long, I don't' give a care. It looks good in my eyes.
#16
As stated before...it is HOW people say things that makes the difference. You can have your opinion...it can be different than someone elses...but be nice about the difference.
Instead of saying something along the lines of "You're an idiot for putting that on your car. It looks terrible."....try "I don't really like it myself, but I am glad you do. I am sure you will enjoy your new mod".
What do you think would get the more "unoffensive" response?
Instead of saying something along the lines of "You're an idiot for putting that on your car. It looks terrible."....try "I don't really like it myself, but I am glad you do. I am sure you will enjoy your new mod".
What do you think would get the more "unoffensive" response?
#17
Hey Firewatcher, I agree with you. The lamest thing is to do a little mod and have 15 people say, "cool", or "looks nice". I really don't mind the people that say, "I sure wouldn't do that to mine, but hope you enjoy it," or "that really looks a little off-center". If you're not going to be honest, then how are people going to get a reality check? It's like going to the Oznium forum and finding out how many people think an HHR is butt ugly! REALITY CHECK! We have to find a balance and keep it real, or it's useless.
#20
It all comes down to( ones mans junk is another mans treasure ) its all in the eye of the beholder.
i visit other car sites that alot of folks get really upset and freak when someone replies about their car in a negative manner!??
The way i see it if you dont like my car or mods dont look at it.
i visit other car sites that alot of folks get really upset and freak when someone replies about their car in a negative manner!??
The way i see it if you dont like my car or mods dont look at it.